Freedom

I knew you weren't the deepest nor largest chocolate chip in the cookie,

but you were the heart, robustly standing out in the pack,

& I'm a Queen...been searching for EverLasting...

Suppose as time progressed & I called you King

& you looked perplexed..

Should've been a clue to the rest...

Yet you determined to no longer be misunderstood as less, 

Or pushed to the back...

Filled my ears...

my head with heart, dreams, goals, 

& the hopes that this could last..

& the deep love for your daughters,

took made my heart a gasp,

Touched me as rare, ambitious, 

With an imagery spread wide & vast...

Over spring & summer rides...

& fall conversations...

laughter & smiles

Your heart captured again...

A friend...

The hidden girl- behind the world,

Behind pains & sorrows unanswered,

Buried under shattered pieces of Her piles of self...

I lifted Me for another chance to share My Love...

My Life...

My Dance...

To be your wife...

to take your hand...

'Til death do us part

You were my man...

As love bloomed...

so did doom

Trying this & that... 

trying to assume

What else to do?..

what else to give?...

How do we live?

...this way...

But i continued to grow within mySelf,

Because I've always been a Seeker...

WithIn Me... I found refugee

You...content standing still, 

shouting demands...

Questioning My elevation... 

with your man-house stances...

Rolling your eyes at my knowledge seeking...

internal wheels in motion 

& you refused to embrace the notion 

     of "such nonsense"....

Irrelevance

No interest at'al...

in anything i loved..

"Ugh do yo have to sing? "

"What you reading now?!"

"Yeah let me see...uh huh...

is that goin' to sale?..

Why you paint stuff like that? 

Ain't nobody here gon' buy stuff like that"

No embracing or inspiration

but I inspired mySelf

 & My kids inspired me..

.think Ma a professional...

"They should put you in a gallery!!"

... and they always bring daily glee!

& soon i asked Who are you?

Where did he go? 

What's really....Going on? 

We've lost love...

focus...hope...support...

this is no longer a home...

just a house filled with misery

You're back there

& I'm in constant motion!

Seeking Me

SelfElevation

Self-education

Forwardness...

& you're content

& you look at me like I'm clueless 

when it's you..

.you could care less

& I no longer care that you don't

For my efforts have been & are useless...

with you

You placed duck tape on my mouth,

Bound my voice,

And condescended my growth....

We grew into business partners

& I've gotten fucked out of the deal

Taken care of my business for years,

Having to squeeze time in just to take care of Me,

but Will gives Me strength...

No touches, kisses, or hugs...

.jus bitchin' & i ain't a bitcher

,it waste My energy...

Unless fully provoked, 

then I knew...

The road had hit The Dead End...

Don't like to be pushed to defend 

My Own InnerSelf

When you don't even know yourSelf

Wondered for a bit... 

how I allowed it to go on so long

But a fighter gon stand to the very last straw

Allowed My Soul to be smothered,

My kids to suffer...

Fighting the battle for love...

Remembering & knowing true love can conquer all...

But the dart you threw clean through my heart

Caused me to trip,

fall,

come to my senses... 

The sight of my own blood & soul shed,

As you looked down & walked through it

Like...write about that...

so I did

Layin' listening to the distant voices of my Wombspring

Was My blood transfusion...

My confirmation... 

of My Resurrection to Rise up for Eye Am!

A Conqueror

A Survivor

More than a mental slave of an imitation protector/provider

What My Soul pours & Reflects...

Eye will open My wings & continue to project...

I've fled mySelf to save My Life!

Your departure is welcome

Subtracting your strife,

you've given Me...

My Daughter & lessons learned...

what you've given us is... 

more than you'll ever comprehend

Freedom!!!

© 10/16/12 LeTisha.Woods