“But he really loves me”
Mmm hmm…you don’t say
“he does a lot for us”
he just may
“I’m just tryin to save my faml’y”
and at what price do you pay?
“he is tryin’”
by leavin you alone every otha day?
Imma tell you what price!
Your body!
in more ways than in and out your yoni
with the milk you’re breastfeedin your babies these morals honey!
By washing their heads of common sense you should borrow
from them…
you should gain it, so you all have a tomorrow
demand freedom, not another form of a woman’s mental slavery
thinkin Self has to be submitted, for love to be gained
if that’s the target- hell don’t even aim
tryin to care for yo self and kids on a po’ mans pay
allowin’ him in and out of you, leaving who knows what in your bay
droppin in for a day, a lay, spittin’ I love you’s and he out again
on his way
“I’ve been treated worse” you say?
Who gives a damn ?!! that means you’ll accept house play
You wanna foreva carry your broken heart’s past on a crutch
Just because he playin the game a lil betta- I’m getting a head rush!!
Cuz he “say” he give a damn, instead of shut the hell up
And cuz every now and then he come by,
holla at the kids and give you a feel up
Sistah getcho guts up!
You’re afraid of losing him and he’s the best you’ve eva had
don’t mean he’s the best- don’t even qualify for the test,
much less the position
It’s because you don’t know your worth and it makes my soul sad
Hell I’m mad!!!
watchin you sitting, waiting on the petty dropplin’s of your tolerance
of the imitation of love
hell you livin the imitation of life
hoping your boy will soon grow into manhood
seein he aint a supporter, lover, dad, father nor friend-
he ain’t a man
can’t believe you pretennnnd-ing
to fall for his lean-trying to conceal as a stand
I’m lookin atcha bound to a quad -tied rope,
like a fiend, waiting on her next hit of dope,
even if it’s on borrowed time, and may devour your soul
jus cuz the last piece of shit was no betta than the 1st
you acceptin this cuz he roun mo often,
lilke you don’ gained surplus
stealin the rest of your joy, your power, your being
you don’t need an individual to make You!
start diving into the love of Your Inner Self!!
…the truth that You know, within the depth of Your Soul
if they ain’t for your best
You’re worth more than settlin for less
cuz you can’t expect you ain’t gon be his toy
and a boy ain’t gon’ play games with your mind-
you uphold it this way
its like a child taught no standards ….one without any rules
they do as they please…..jus as they choose
your words don’t mean a thing
they’ve learned to play your emotions,
like a pro on a crap table
give hugs, kisses to drown your bitchin’
flowers and candy to cover their screw ups
and you trying to think of how to butter up their burnt toast
and there you go
“It’s Ok, I know I need to better, it will get better” “We’ll be OK”
I guess you left the toast in too long,
when you were wonderin why he didn’t come home
&
Two days lata you drownin in tears
He doing shit his way, like he has for years
Same ol’ replay scratchin’ your heart
My Sistah are you ready for a raw start
Off with his ass
Find YourSelf
and a “Man” will find you
Jus cuz you been caught up with boys
and this one’s a bit better than the last
don’t give you an excuse to continue to be nobody’s ass.
It’s just a character you playin’
tryin’ to fill two roles
Ain’t a thing sweeter than the love of a Man,
who is too old to be figurin Manhood out
waiting to seal the scratches of your heart,
from fools past
cuz He’s buried those routes
Know YourSelf
Step up into Your Inner Queendom,
you deserve more than he will ever know.
Urth Eagle
© LeTisha.Bowie 7/13/12
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